Day 149: Job 22-26; Final Accusations

As we have discussed over the past couple of days, when people encounter others that are dealing with pain and struggles in their life, it can become very uncomfortable for those who mean well trying to be supportive.  Like Job’s friends, we are more than willing to sit and be silent with our friends who are suffering.  We gladly share in their grief offering compassion and love in as many ways as we can.  We can subscribe to the idea of being slow to speak and quick to listen, willingly offering our shoulders for others to cry on.  We even bring meals to our friends who are traveling through the dark valleys of life.  These are all good things, and easy things for us to do.  They show that we care, communicate our good will and intentions, and provide support for those dealing with pain.

Yet what happens when our friends start asking questions about the struggles that they are going through?  Maybe the first two are not so bad.  They might ask “why me?” or say “I wish so-and-so was still with us.”  We can nod or shrug, silently still giving support without engaging the questions that we have no answers to.  These questions are normal for people to ask.  We don’t really think that they are looking for answers, but rather just traveling down the road of grief and trying to make sense of the situation.  But when the questions keep coming, just like most people, we start to get uncomfortable.

People like to have answers, order, and processes.  We are naturally curious about how things work and why they work the way that they do.  Humanity strives for knowledge, and especially in the last 150 years or so, work hard to discover and learn about the world and how it functions.  But these difficult things, they don’t have simple little explanations or solutions; they don’t often fit into our categories or life processes.  There really are no good answers for why someone very close to you died at a young age, or why your family member got cancer, or why that young girl got hit by a train.  No explanations or logic can really figure that out.  And this makes us uncomfortable.

Unfortunately, the questions don’t always stop when we start feeling uncomfortable.  A grieving mother doesn’t look up from  her painfully blank staring to say, “Oh I can see that my grief and questions are making you uncomfortable, I’ll stop.”  No, instead she just continues to ask questions of both men and God.  This is the point at which we feel uncomfortable.  It is here that we tend to shut down, disengage, ignore, or even become angry.  We often end up here, and today we see that clearly Job’s friends are at this same place anymore.

Here we pick up the final accusations of Job’s friends Elephaz and Bildad.  They have gone through a great deal of discourse, talking back and forth, listening to Job’s pleas and questions before God almighty.  They are ok to sit with him, but when the rubber meets the road, they are just as ignorant to the true purposes of God as everyone else in the world.  But rather than returning to a point in which they can be supportive and uplifting, they choose to take out the anger and struggle on Job.  We have read their accusations against Job, they are bitter and unhelpful to this suffering man.

Perhaps it was something in their past that has been brought up while Job sufferings and struggles even for breath after all the calamity that has fallen on him.  Perhaps it is their unfulfilled need to be able to explain the world and put logic to words in these crazy times.  In any case, Job’s friends have listened and been somewhat supportive, but clearly now they have had enough. Rather than saying that they didn’t truly know why all this was happening to Job they have chosen the past of anger and even accusation.  Job doesn’t need someone who questions their every saying, he needs someone who is willing to listen and dwell with him in the dark valley of the shadow of death.  Job needs someone with open ears, not an open mouth.

Today we read the last accusations of Job’s three friends.  As you do, ask yourself which character you can relate with.  Maybe you find death or struggles uncomfortable.  Perhaps you are scared of the questions that might be raised?  Are you quick to cast blame so that you don’t have to process of the emotions or answer the questions that people ask.  As you evaluate yourself, ask yourself… who am I in this story?  Is that who I truly want to be?